Thanks for the gifts..

A very short post, to thank them for the gifts..

Thanks Shirley, for the wonderful bars.

Chloe too, thanks for the message!

I should be strong, but time after time I've been battered with insults and verbal abuses. The mind is willing, but the flesh is weak.

I'm so inspired to write a poem, gotta work it out soon.

Botanical Gardens..

Most of us, especially teenagers somehow cringe when there's a trip to unlikely places such as Singapore Zoo, or Botanical Gardens.

I am one of them who didn't really liked the idea of going to the Botanical Gardens, if not for my project a few months ago.

I had to take photographs of orchids, and along the way I took some intriguing photographs.

I personally find it a challenge, because I didn't have much experience in regards to photographing plants and flowers. I had some really weird and difficult angles which got my whole body aching.

But here are some of my favourite ones:

A road to a nursery?

Initially I didn't find this nice, but suddenly the angle and the vibrant colours simply made me put it here..

I think the sunlight added a nice touch to this one..

Took this underneath a big leaf when the sun was shining on it.

And last but not least, here's my fave photo:

I find it extremely nice because of the intricate details on the plant, and the sunlight that shone specially on this plant. Not the best, but my favourite among all of them..

Well hope you enjoy them!

James Ho Locksmith?

Spotted this shop at Peace Centre with my friends like few weeks ago.




It's not opened by me, or any of my relatives!


Oh yes, I have to talk about this incident which happened on the train last weekend. I was in the jam-packed train in North-East Line, and I was standing at a corner, feeding music to my ears.

As I was listening, the train braked at one particular stop. GUESS WHAT HAPPENED?

THIS LITTLE GIRL GRABBED MY FATS. Can you imagine the scenario?

She probably was finding something to grab, held on to my shirt, but perhaps my shirt was too tight, (QUIT FANTASISING PEOPLE.) and she grabbed to my fats.

The whole moment was so awkward, and she felt for a good old 10 seconds.

WHEN DID I BECAME A POLE?! But still, I'm glad that I saved that poor girl's life from falling down!

Starting to see the day.

Thanks for all the concern, because after enduring a tough weekend; I can't believe I ended work at 11.15pm on Friday and worked on Saturday as well.

I've decided to look on the positive side, and persevere. Thanks to everyone who commented, and encouraged me.

And that of course, includes my liasion officer cum mentor, Mr Ransome Chua. The sms and the call really hit me hard, and I thank him for that.

I've got 8 weeks left, and I shall look forward to it, and learn to love the attachment.

Here are some excerpts from the sms:

Losers are the quitters, winners come about because they never quit, but pick themselves up when they fall time after time. Don't run away from your fears, because fear always has a way of overtaking you and starting you in the face.

Face up to it, do your best and kill that fear; for that is the only way to vanquish it. And in the end you will stand tall because you know you can do it.


That hit me hard. REAL HARD. It was one of the most powerful thoughts I've ever read, and it left a deep impact on me.

So yep, I'll not rant and try to be positive. Always.

Thanks all and I love each and single one of you.

Can I be happy at work?

Sorry for the lack of updates, because most of the time I'm back home rather late and is rather too tired to pen down my thoughts.. But still, I thank you for coming back to check again. Somehow, there'll be alot of texts..

I'm penning my thoughts down, and whether it is a rant or a complaint that will affect me, I don't really care anymore.

I've never felt so indignant, sad and depressed for a long while. I want to love my work. I really do. But why do I find so much sadness in this attachment?

Is it because I didn't get what I wanted? I've complained before that I have to OT everyday. Initially I thought it was fault, because I couldn't do things properly and quick.

My boss told me before: "Actually I don't encourage interns to OT."

Few days later he asked:

"What time did you finish work yesterday?"
"8.30pm."
"So early?"

Probably in a joking manner but I wasn't amused.

Because I will NEVER be let off at 6.30pm, it's very difficult to meet up with fellow friends on weekdays. They get released on the dot, maybe slightly while more. And they still had to wait for me and called to ask because I can never give a definite timing.

I tried to work things as fast as I could, so that I can be let off by 6.30pm.

But it was not meant to be. Take today for example, I was summoned at 4pm to crop this group of peoples' photographs, and compile every single one of them into this template. 2 hours deadline.

The techniques were easy. But guess how many photographs do I have to crop? MORE THAN 400!!!

Of course I overshot, and 1 of my boss decided to let me off early, seeing that I was sick today. 8.15pm that is.

Then suddenly, another boss wanted to check my sketches:

"Hey James, are you meeting with anyone?"
"No.." (Who am I to reject right?)
"Ok lets discuss."

I was pissed, and so tired. And the whole thing ended at 9.30pm today. I was so disappointed today, because he said something like: "finish ur diploma and go do other stuff that you like."

I somehow interpreted that he had given up hope on me or something like that. That made me felt sad.

And to add on to my fury, I was told that I might need to come back to do work for this coming weekend.

I SERIOUSLY CANNOT TAKE IT. It's like you have OT for the past few weeks and yet you might still need to come back this coming weekend?

I need to stop here. My mood is worsening after each sentence.

FRIENDS, DON'T CONTACT ME TO GO OUT ON WEEKDAYS ANYMORE. I DON'T HAVE A LIFE.

My mundane life..

Thanks for those who cared, I really appreciates it. Things has started to get better, though I still have to OT all the way. Met up with my polytechnic friends and we talked about our internship life. And it's great to meet up with them. Tian Tian I miss you too!

I think it's about time I pick myself up, have the confidence that I once had and start afresh. I've been rusty and behind the scenes lately.

I was looking at my previous photographs, but I had a good laugh at this one.

CHLOE AND ME KISSED.

WHAT IF MY GIRLFRIEND GETS ANGRY?! Damn!

Ok, not past tense, because we never really did. Year 2 memories, and it's how interesting time flies.

And to Clarence, Derrick and Clement, all the best for your National Service!

I dread design.

First week of attachment has passed, and I'm already 70% sure that I'm not going to do design anymore. Plus now I'm in such a foul mood, thanks the flu that I had today which really brought my mood down. So if you excuse me, allow me to rant here.

I've just only finished the first week, and I've never felt that kind of stress of a long time. It's fine that I do some menial jobs, but I've been doing projects that I'm unfamiliar or very poor at.

I've got projects in hand and I've never dread development so much before. Stuff such as finishing the final artwork concept every day continuously or even doing 5 concepts before lunchtime prove to be an impossible task for a mediocre junior designer like me.

Someone kill me please. I've been working overtime and has never finish at 6.30pm on time before. And don't tell me that doing unfamiliar stuff or things that I'm very poor at will help me to improve.

Think about it, when you pray to God, you will pray that everything will go on smoothly and hope there will not be obstacles for you.

You don't go: "Oh lord, please let something happen to me so I can become a better person."

If you are a person who dashes across the red traffic light often, you will NEVER think that one day you will get knocked down by a car and learn a lesson from it.


Friends that are on internship are never as worse as me, as far as I know. I'm not trying to pinpoint, but I'm disappointed that I wasn't exactly into publication.

My bosses and colleague are nice people, but not the work. And I hope that things will get better as I endure my 12 weeks of gruel internship.

PETA, you're a pile of bullshit.

PETA stands for People for the Ethnical Treatment of Animals. It's how nice to hear that they don't support animal testing, fur farming etc, and how passionate they feel about animal rights and fight for these animals. Most or all of PETA members are vegetarians.

I myself support some of the stuff, including whale killing etc. But sometimes they can be really ludicrous and how far their thinking is.

Here's what happened:


President Obama was in a television interview, and he smacked a house fly in the middle of the interview when the fly keep persistently interrupting him in the interview. The fly died.


Now, PETA is calling it an "execution" and wants President Obama to show more compassion to even "the least sympathetic animals."

PETA continued further: He isn't the Buddha, he's a human being, and human beings have a long way to go before they think before they act.

And PETA gave Obama a device to trap flies so that they can be released outside.


You can watch the video of the interview here:



PETA, what is your problem with a fly dying? Some flies can be of great danger to human beings because they can transmit diseases, or worst still, eat your flesh.

Do you just stand there and let the fly consume you or whatsoever? Or will you defend yourself by killing it?

Sure, you can say that you're referring to harmless flies, and we should show compassion to them. But think about it. Isn't it a natural instinct for people to smack a fly when it is irritating him/her? And how you can even link the incident to the Buddha. It's god damn hilarious, PETA.


You guys puts adoptive animals to sleep (equates to killing as well) and yet you made a big fuss of President Obama killing a fly. It's time to get real, PETA.


I used to have respect for you, but this incidence made me lost most of it, if not all. I feel very strongly about certain topics when my bullshit detector went off. And this is one of them.

And you, PETA is a pile of shit, and cares about such mundane stuff. Why? Because flies love to stick around shit.


This is best I feel what summaries PETA:

"I'm all for animal rights, but PETA is unbelievable."

Some current stuff..

First and foremost, I wanna say a BIG THANK-YOU to Tzewei, for helping me today and getting my way through the office.

I've got a nice colleague and 2 seemingly nice bosses, but I had to sign a contract due to the nature of the work that Im going to do, and it is so highly confidential that Im not allowed to post any of the related stuff at all!

And I'm working from 9.30am to around 7-8pm everyday... I don't mind doing menial jobs, but I just didn't like the idea of having OT.. And I'm not doing much of publications as well. Yes, I'm complaining, not that I should, but oh well..

I somehow dread the first day of work, and as far as I'm concerned, I think the next 3 months will be a little bit of heaven, but a whole lot of hell. Let's just hope I don't hate design.

That aside, I've watched Transformers 2 with my good friends, which I've haven't seen for few weeks? I had great fun that night.

I'll give a rating for 3.5/5 for Transformers 2 this time round, and I must say that it is pretty good, but the storyline wasn't that strong.

Ahh, and it's also Mir-ene's 21st birthday! She's damn cute and sweet!

She's really drunk!

I adore this class!


Okay, gotta turn in for now! Im tired!

Let's pay a tribute.

I will be having my attachment next week, and I'm not really looking forward to it.. Ahhh, and it lasts for 9 weeks. Let's just hope that they have more publication projects, which my interest currently lies in.





And.. Im supposed to blog about happy stuff.. but today, one of the greatest legends in the world has died.





His name is Michael Jackson.






I'm not really a true blue fan of his, but I loved some of his songs such as "Earth Song" and "Heal the World". He writes beautiful songs, and of course his magnificent dancing as well.

Apparently, he died of a heart attack in a rented apartment..

Regardless of the scandals that happened to him or whatsoever, let's give credit and respect to the King of Pop, and let's pay a tribute to him.

Rest in peace, Michael Jackson.

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Battered and Beaten.

Somehow, depression sets in again for me. I just don't know why. Losing confidence in everything I do, doing for the sake of doing.

Suddenly, I just felt there were too many responsibilities that I couldn't ignore, and I felt so overwhelmed. It's been a while since I really sat down and think.

I sometimes think I'm a lunatic. I sometimes even think what is it like to have a terminal disease.

And recently, I've been frequently trying to induce cough to get a kick out of it.

I have great friends, wonderful family and a good and positive future. But yet sometimes I think Im better off dead. 

Don't take this post that seriously though, perhaps Im just talking nonsense.

Led by my nose.

Sometimes, I simply do design work just do please my lecturers, having no opinions for my work at all. Now, I'm so stressed and desperately need a breather.

Busy till next week. Will blog when I have the time.

The Singapore Idol Experience.

If you ask me how's the experience like for Singapore Idol, the first thing that comes to my mind, is the hot and humid weather that roasted the contestants.

I queued up with my fellow friend, Donavan at around 7.30am on Saturday. It's been a long time since I've suffered such weather, and we queued all the way till 5.30pm, only to be able to register for the auditions, which happened on the next day.

If you had read the papers, there are over 4000 people who signed up.. In order to create effects for the show, here's a peek for you:

They called some contestants to get high with Gurmit Singh.

It's like: This is Gurmit Singh and...

Contestants: WELCOME TO SINGAPORE IDOL!

You don't see people wearing ridiculous outfits and costumes that will make them a fool of themselves. 99% of them wear smart casual outfits.

Of course, there are the irritating ones who cut queues, and those punk rocker wannabes have their nails painted black, and had tattoos all over. (Paul Twohill wannabe as well?)

When you're queueing up for like 18-20 hours in total, you will start to talk with people around you and you'll be surprised how nice they are. The new friends I've made have joined local singing competitions such as Anugerah and Campus Superstar. And they made it till the next few rounds.

Don, Farhan and I..

Farhan sang Fly Me To The Moon..

The middle one is his girlfriend..

Another friend is Hillary, who's the one in the middle.

Comical and nice girl, she's only 16 and has big dreams!

So ya.. all of us had our auditions on Sunday.. and we met up first before queueing up.

This is my registration number..

4D punters can go buy this number.. 2296! Hehehehe!

Our seats before going up to the waiting room.

In the waiting room were the contestants, and we get to hear them sing because they're rehearsing. I tell you, most of them knows how to sing, while some have fantastic voices. And well, some can't really sing.

AUDITION EXPERIENCE

Finally when it was my turn for the audition, I walked up one of the cinemas (they held auditions in the cinemas they rented) and turned right.

On my right were two motionless-looking producers, and 2-3 super bright spotlights shining down at me, with a huge camera smack right at the middle to film me.

And then, after telling them my registration number, and telling them the song which I was going to sing (Mad World, Gary Jules) and started singing.

The atmosphere was tense, and it was extremely silent. Then, I started singing. My heart was beating extremely fast, and every time I take a breath to continue the next sentence, I felt even more difficult to breathe.

But my notes hit the right tune, the tempo was right and everything seems to go well and smooth. Suddenly, I was asked to stop singing. It has only reach like the 4th or 5th sentence of the lyrics, and it wasn't even at the chorus yet.

The whole audition lasted barely a minute and I asked to leave. There wasn't any comments about my singing or whatsoever.

Then, we had to go to the results room, where they named all our registration numbers, and said we didn't make it and thank us for the participation.

At that point, I personally felt neutral. Not even a tinge of sadness or happiness. I took rejection easily.

I've always felt that a good singer is a good storyteller. A singer does not need to have the powerful vocals of Beyonce, Mariah Carey, or even Whitney Houston. But what the singer needs is to be able to emote and relate to the songs, so that the audience can connect and listen to them.

People ask if I'm going to join more competitions next time. My answer is 50:50. 

Once again, I'm really touched and blessed at all the support you guys have given.

I will be recording more songs, and will continue to soar.

Because I will continue to sing.

I suddenly see a surge of viewership in my blog, probably to see what my results were? Ahh, enough of beating around the bush, but I didn't make it.

The judges were the producers of the show, and I guess my song didn't sit well with them. This weekend had been really hectic and tired.

Despite my exit, I came to realise the value of friendship, because my friends gave support and encouragement. Dozens of messages, and I felt really touched.


Of course, every single concerned one gave me consolations and some were rather hilarious. But I have to say, I wasn't the least bit disappointed or sad. I should say neutral.


You see, I went into the audition room with only 2 producers and 1 or 2 cameramen, and me singing alone. I felt really nervous. I found it difficult to breathe.


But I must say that my vocals didn't fail me. I hit the right tune with the correct beat, so Im rather happy. I mean, if I went to that audition, and I suddenly went out of tune, or something that went horribly wrong, than I will be really disappointed and sad. Thankfully, it's not the case.

I can imagine some people laughing or smirking at my exit right now, but I think I don't really care. I'll blog about the whole process and experience soon.

Right now, here's a quote that I found interesting in the movie, Fame:

In this world, it's not about how big you can make it. It's how far you can take it.


I did my best, and my exit does not act as a deterrent for me not to sing. I will continue to sing, and continue to shine.

One of the most nerve-wrecking moments of my life.

Ahh, this Saturday will prove to be one of the most nerve-wrecking moments of my life. Yeah that's right. I'm joining the national's singing competition, Singapore Idol.

I've been preserving my voice for the past week, and singing everyday. A lot of people have asked me before why didn't I join this competition or that, well I didn't have the courage to do so.

But now, I have the courage, mainly because of the encouragement that Mr Vin (A lecturer) has given me, which was filled with such sincerity. Also, the peoples' comments made in my Youtube page..

Also, I just wanna see how far I can go and how I can improve..

Hopefully, people will give me their support regardless of the results, and not laugh at my exit..

Wish me luck..

Second chance..

Currently listening to Corrinne May's Love Song for the #1, which is my favourite song in her albums. I somehow has the urge to write a poem regarding ex-convicts, well probably because my current project involves them.

Looking back at the days when I committed crimes,

I felt naive, stupid and foolish.

But now, repentance and acceptance is all I wish to find.

I walked out, after seven years in jail.

Bright sky, fresh air but no family in sight.

I asked myself ; Am I destined to fail,

when no relatives were there to invite?

I suffered and have been duly punished.

Why can't I have a second chance?

Didn't I had enough anguish,

that sticked with me for months?

I've turned over a new leaf.

But how did the society perceived me?

An ex-convict with a stigma.

Is that how I got my karma?

I wish I had a second chance...

-James

My favourite photographs.

I'm not known as a photographer to any of my friends or relatives. Photography is part of my life, though I never stated it as one of my interests until now. Ever since I got hold of my own camera, I've been taking photographs as and when I like, and I do like to consider myself an amateur photographer.

To me, a good photograph means you can emote and connect to it, as if you're at that very moment.

Here, I will show you some of my favourite photographs I've taken over the past few years, and some involves school work, while some are taken with personal interests. Do comment!

Note: Pardon me for the inconsistencies of watermarks in the photographs!

All photographs are taken using the Fujifilm F50fd.

ANIMALS AND INSECTS

Title: The Solemn Monkey

Location: Singapore Zoological Gardens

Title: Motherly Love

Location: Puok, Cambodia

Title: Smitten Love

Location: Nanyang Polytechnic

NATURE AND PLACES

Title: Thorns with a Prick

Location: Southern Ridges, Singapore

Title: Light of the Darkness

Location: Southern Ridges, Singapore

Title: The Street of Serenity

Location: Puok, Cambodia

Title: Boys

Location: Puok, Cambodia

Title: The Slingshot Girl

Location: Puok, Cambodia

I don't know about you guys, but the last photograph, The Slingshot Girl was my favourite among these. Her solmen expression emotes very well in my opinion.

Well, do comment after seeing these photographs!

May Babies!

I don't know why, but suddenly there are many friends are born in the month of May. I've attended more than 6 birthday celebrations. Still, Happy Birthday buddies! Will post up pictures soon..

Life is still rather stagnant, and I've been neglecting this blog for a while, which probably explains the decreasing traffic of this blog. Sorry people, this blog no longer proves to be much of an entertainment.

School is still boring, 9am to 5.30pm almost everyday, and school work is starting to pile up as weeks go by. I've submitted two entries for the Crowbar award and hopefully I can get shortlisted..

I sometimes feel that Im not a good friend, but yet I always seem to see the true light of friendship. Thanks guys. I really appreciates it.

Will be back, and Im going to share some of my fave photography here.

Curtains' finally closing.

Have you ever felt that the world is coming to an end?

The flowers are withering.

The trees are burning

Women and children are crying.

Everyone are dying.

Suddenly, the happenings around the world is just like a show.

A show full of fears.

Performers flowed with tears,

Knowing that the ending is near.

And finally, the performance is ending.

Curtains' finally closing.

And every single one of us, dying.