I just feel that I should just visit this old avenue of mine, because the future still holds a lot of uncertainties for me, and I just feel like typing at this point of time. And for now, I'm scared.
These 4 months of training has indeed made me a stronger person, and I've lost tremendous amount of weight, and being tougher mentally.
But it seems that God wants to prepare me for a path that's tougher than I can imagine. I'm in a state of mixed feelings, and I'm not prepared at all.
It's all my fault I guess. Always hoping for the best, and yet when I fall, the disappointment sinks in. Friends around me seems to get the best deal, and I should be looking it in a different light, a different perspective.
I'm trying to be happy, I really am. But my personality makes me otherwise, and right now I need guidance, and motivation. Something that I can look forward to.
