Happy New Year! It's 2009!

Thanks for all the compliments on the previous post! Glad that you guys like it!


School term has started it has been quite a bore. But it's still holiday seasons in most parts of the world..

So I shall end this year with an autobiography, and also a quick take of I'm Yours by Jason Mraz to start off 2009!



Hope you guys like it!


Happy Holidays and a Happy New Year!

Looking back from the end of the year.

It's going to be 2009 soon as December approaches closely to an end. And soon, I'll be turning 20. I hate being 20 soon, because it makes me feel old. Yes people, by the time I turn 50, it'll probably makes me feel ancient.

I'm still 19, and before I move on to the 20s, I like to be in cerebration to think about what has happened to me during the past decade, and how I look forward to the next world of 20s.

So let's start the ball rolling, with the series of events in tongue-in-cheek AND IT'S ALL ABOUT ME..

When I was 4 years old, I was the hot favourite among my mom's friends. I wonder why:

Somehow, I was lusting for something.

YES I AM HERE!

Waiting impatiently.

I had my cheeks being pinched almost every single day, which probably explains my pimple face.

I didn't really like food and was rather picky about it. My mom kept asking the doctor how to make me grow fatter. The doctor couldn't help much.

But when I was 10 years old, my mom's wish came true:

YES, I'm the one of the left.

OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD

OH-MY-GAWD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I never knew I looked so hot.

Like seriously. Like totally.

The first thing I could have ask myself was: WHAT ON EARTH HAPPENED TO YOU?

I don't know what happened to me, but my only excuses are puberty and the impact it had on me when I changed from Tampines North Primary School (an awesome school by the way) to Compassvale Primary School.

And my mom went to the doctor and asked: Can you make my son grow thinner?

I was as fat as a pig, and was incorrigibly lazy. My days in Compassvale Primary School was to slack all the way. Up till now, I have no recollection of my studying days, if I had any.

So at the age of 12 years old, I did badly for my Primary School Leaving Examinations (PSLE), with an aggregate score of 186.

I enrolled into Normal Academic of 5 years of secondary education in North Vista Secondary School.

Image Courtesy of http://www.designshare.com/

At the age of 13, I was nicknamed a Panda by Han Wen and Jeremy. The nickname has been associated with me ever since.

Joined Choir.

Under the wings of Mr Francis Liew, I've never looked back since.

At the age of 14, my slacking attitude continued, and I was enrolled in a class named 3N2.

At the age of 16, I had to face my first hurdle: 'N' levels. It was extremely difficult for me, because of the stigma associated with the class, and delinquents were in and out of the class, making the morale of the class low.

I managed to work very hard for my 'N' levels.

I scored 6 points in total, and I was very proud of myself of achieving the scores.

I was already in choir, and it was totally awesome.

At the age of 17, it was the most important year of my life. I had to overcome 'O' levels. Another extremely difficult year, because of the stigma you face again, and being the worst class to take 'O' levels didn't help. And you have to be positive against those naysayers.

I did my best for the 'O' levels, despite not being pleased with some of the performance.

'O' levels results.

I made a controversial decision to choose polytechnic over junior college. It was the toughest decision of my life. You know that kind of feeling when you feel you wanted to give it a shot despite being against the odds, and you've got only limited choices to choose from in polytechnic.

I also took my dream sport: Diving.

I look totally hot in wetsuits. Like seriously.

Got a silver for Choir..

Performed at the Golden Jubilee.

At the age of 18, I went to Nanyang Polytechnic studying Visual Communication.

The proudest work that I've done.

At the age of 19......I managed to go to Cambodia to do voluntary work.

and this year, 2008..there were so many versions of me.

Looking... err.. provocative?

Looking crazy.

Looking innocent.

Looking hot.

But regardless of what image I portrays, I am still me. And I don't know what 2009 holds for me, but I'm excited.

And thanks for supporting this blog all these while.. you guys are very much loved!

So I shall show you a recent face of mine, which is still as awesome as always of course...and also..

JAMESLANCER.BLOGSPOT.COM WOULD LIKE TO WISH YOU A MERRY CHRISTMAS AND A HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!!!

Spice up my room.

I'm finally getting a new room of my own, and since I have to improvise with whatever I have:

Blue and yellow furniture and marble flooring:

Colours above are a bit similar to the hues of the colours of my furniture. 

Thankfully, my parents are open to the colours I choose for my room, with the only condition that the main colour of the room must not be dark and the choice of only 1 colour.

I figured out the various colour combinations, and with red out of the question, I decided to choose...

Orange.

I'm fine with any hues of orange, and I thought the colour would contrast well with the improvisation. So I guess I'll let my mom decide for me.

Let's see what does orange means...

Advantages:

1. One of the healing colours.

2. Stimulates enthusiasm and creativity.

3. Vitality with endurance.

4. Relief from things becoming too serious.

5. To spice things up when things become draggy.

6. Be more involved in something.

7. Lady luck's colour is Orange.

Disadvantages:

1. It is said to increase the craving for food.

That's such a disadvantage for me! I don't want to grow as round as an orange! (pun intended) I guess I will have to put up a NO FOOD AND DRINKS sign on my room door!

Goodbye N70, Hello...........

I've been using Nokia N70 since I was in Secondary 5 and it had weathered many storms in my life. My N70 was simply perfect, and it wasn't also a smartphone. I should even called it a toughphone.

Being rather rough at handling stuff, with droplets of falling getting in to my N70, and forgetting the countless impact that it has sustained for the past few years. Its body was falling apart and torn, and it became unsightly. Yet its heart stood till the test of time, till now.

Its screen went blank.

Despite its screen being blank, I was able to make phone calls only when I know the caller's number.

Still, it brought lots of trouble for me. So I decided to search for a phone that I liked, and I was thankful for N70, so I decided to choose something along the line of the N Series.

I've fallen for something that's bigger. Something that is darker.

The N95 8 GB.

Yes, I've fallen in love with this phone! It's kinda bulky, but it suits me I guess!

Simply love it!

'N' levels results..

Just wanna wish my brother all the best for his 'N' level results this coming thursday..

Hopefully he will do well.

Bad hair days..

I'm having my 2 weeks break now, yet I've still got submissions that need to be handed in.


Life's been rather stale and I really cannot understand how we can live life to the fullest. I mean, each and every single one of us are being plagued by problems and work.


Sigh, I desperately need money and I'm seriously getting really stressed over my schoolwork and job. To be perfectly honest, I haven't really taken a good break since my polytechnic life. And how I wish I can simply relax during the 2 weeks/2 month break.


And recently I've been feeling rather irritated when some people commented how I should have written this, or how should I written that. I even had people challenging me to type this, put this and whatsoever. Thanks for the intentions, but perhaps you should be reminded that this is my blog, and I write accordng to my own will, and would not like to be threatened in any way.


I'm quite unhappy the way life is, but I'll try to lean towards the bright side of life.

In a relationship..

I've been bombarded with questions by so many people, because I simply changed my status to "In a relationship".

The fact is that technically speaking I am in a relationship. And if you guys are regulars in my blog, you should know who I am attracted to...

Yes, it's Sok Pheap..

It's kinda like a long-distance relationship. But we'll see how it goes.

Right now, I'm happy!

It's our god-forsaken right to be loved.

I finally had the time and mood to blog.

Let's see, my life has been revolving around projects, and I find it really pathetic that my life is being ruled by deadlines.


Speaking of which, I've been rather indignant and irritated recently. So much so that I feel like shouting to that person. It's so stupid of me to be taken for granted and still be nonchalant about it.

I haven't been singing much in class, but let me tell you the feeling's back! I haven't been hearing good songs until I heard Jason Mraz's I'm Yours.

I just feel like singing every now and then! I like the song so much that I wanna do a recording/video on it!

Just in case if anyone is reading this, is there any girls out there who wanna do a duet with me of a song called "Lucky" by Jason Mraz and Colbie Caillat?!

A tribute to my granduncle..

It was the death of my granduncle a few weeks ago, and at that same week I decided to record a song for my granduncle as a form of tribute.

And so, I chose a song named Dance With My Father by the late Luther Vandross.


It was extremely difficult to sing this song, because it was the week of mourning and griefing and I wasn't totally in the mood to sing. The worst part was breaking down while singing, especially the lyrics:

Sometimes I'd listen outside her door
And I'd hear how my mother cried for him
I pray for her even more than me


It somehow made me think of my aunts mourning and weeping for my granduncle.

Finally after many hours of recording and numerous retakes, I managed to record it smoothly. The recording wasn't perfect, but I did my best at that point of time.


If you had heard of the original song Dance With My Father by Luther Vandross, you would have known that our direction for the song is different. However, I really hope that my rendition of the song will do some justice to the great man himself.

If possible, do give me some feedback and ratings for the song ya? Thanks.




Granduncle, I know that you will hear this song somehow. I hope you know that all of us will remember and love you. This is for you, Granduncle..


Dance With My Father - Luther Vandross




Lyrics:

Back when I was a child, before life removed all the innocence
My father would lift me high and dance with my mother and me and then
Spin me around 'til I fell asleep
Then up the stairs he would carry me
And I knew for sure I was loved


If I could get another chance, another walk, another dance with him
I'd play a song that would never, ever end
How I'd love, love, love
To dance with my father again


When I and my mother would disagree
To get my way, I would run from her to him
He'd make me laugh just to comfort me
Then finally make me do just what my mama said
Later that night when I was asleep
He left a dollar under my sheet
Never dreamed that he would be gone from me


If I could steal one final glance, one final step, one final dance with him
I'd play a song that would never, ever end
'Cause I'd love, love, love
To dance with my father again


Sometimes I'd listen outside her door
And I'd hear how my mother how she cried for him
I pray for her even more than me
I pray for her even more than me


I know I'm praying for much too much
But could you send back the only man she loved
I know you don't do it usually
But dear Lord she's dying
To dance with my father again
Every night I fall asleep and this is all I ever dream




Note: Different web browsers might cause the player to autoplay

Happy Birthday Mom!

Happy 48th Birthday Mom!!!

I pray and wish that you will be forever blissful and have a longevity life. If possible, I would hope that we'll make it rich someday so that life will not be as tough anymore.

Remember that your sons are always with you and love you, and once again, Happy Birthday Mom! You're the best mother in the world, and cannot be compared!


Happy Birthday to Aunt Caroline as well!

P.S: I realise it's Britney Spear's birthday as well!

Who gives you the right to kill the innocent?

I've been feeling sad over the death of a Singaporean who was held hostage by terrorists in Mumbai. I don't know her personally, but I somehow felt sad because she was part of the countrymen.

The sole survivor of the group of terrorists even said: "Please I don't want to die!" What a stupid comment, after being involved in the killing of more than 200 people, many whom are innocent. He's going to be charged for killing these people anyway. Don't worry, I'll pray for you to enter and rot in hell for killing the innocent. Best still: Your soul be perished forever, without leaving a single trace of your existence.


And to those people who died, rest in peace..

And also, rest in peace, Lo Hoei Yen..

Copy. Modify. Copy.

In order to sound jubilant and lighten my mood, I decided to show you some of the interesting photos that I've taken. These photos cracked me up, so yeah here it goes...

Alien-positioned eyes with a bulging head!

A young boy at heart.

What ever happened to this variation?

Now you know how I look like with manipulations on my face..

Perhaps, there's a limit..

I've always considered myself to be mature in terms of thinking and writing. I'm fully aware that I'm not an intelligent and a creative person.


That's why I worked hard for my Math. It didn't paid off. I felt so guilty because I let everyone down. My first year in Polytechnic was complete bullshit, because my drawing and painting screwed me up. I got 2 for my GPA.


Motivational and inspirational quotes are there for a reason. It keeps us alive and ongoing. But I'm starting to lose faith. I'm starting to falter. I'm starting to question.


It's just like the analogy of the wolf and the 3 little pigs. He huffed and puffed at the house. With all his utmost might, he huffed and puffed again. But he couldn't bring the house down. And he left.


I'm cognizant that my works are practically shit. But I kept telling myself: "I'm improving, bit by bit. It's the process that's important."

Then suddenly at the end of the day you realise that the finished product/results is what that matters, and here comes the reality:

"I cannot make it to local universities with this kind of GPA."


And now, here comes the conflicting views.


Angel: James, you should continue to work hard! Whether you get into university doesn't matter, as long as you know you've been working hard and can answer to yourself.

Demon: What were you even thinking? The fact is that you cannot get into local universities (unless you miraculously gets 4 for your GPA every semester, which doesn't happen). Why waste your precious money printing and buying materials when at the end of the day, you know that you can never make it to the university?



Although I'm able to comprehend the nature of this whole thing, I guess I'm still sticking my guns to the angelic side. I'll make a decision as time goes along.

What's wrong with me?

I wonder if it's the stress that is piling up, or troubled over some trivial stuff.

I feel no obligation, but for once...


I've lost the will to blog.

Hope about you..

This is a poem/lyrics that I wrote randomly, so I just wanna share it with you guys..







Hope About You

Poem/Lyrics by James Ho







The friends you make in life
They influence your mindset and thoughts
So they will impact the path you decide
When you never expect yourself to get caught





When your family saw you at the police station, they cried "please!"
Defiantly, you refused to see them
And they were already on their knees.



When you finally got out from prison and into the society
You got yourself in a gang fight
They said you showed no filial piety
And it was such an ugly sight.





They say a leopard never change its spots
I say you were incorrigible
Because you knew you shouldn't fought.
Yet you did the unthinkable.





Life is not a fairy tale
You need to overcome and turn over a new leaf
Otherwise you would simply falter and fail
Be prepared that you need to give



For we still harbour hope on you
And with the sun shining bright
Hurry up, finish your term which is due
You will soon feel and see the end of light

Some pictures..

Rebecca took some really nice shots for me from her Nikon DSLR so I decided to post it here.

These photos are nice in my opinion, although I didn't crop them out. Perhaps one or two will be used for my next template.

Wei Qi said I looked good in bangs, which I ultimately realise it means fringe. I had the preconceived idea that bangs are the term used for girls only. The hairstyle is an old one, because I wanted something different. So yeah, there you go..

No, I wasn't doing any punishment.

Something astonishing happened?

Smiling sheepishly..

In deep cerebration...

Rebecca, thanks for the pictures!

Photojournalism.

One of my biggest exposure to reality is by Photojournalism, whereby it is a form a journalism that uses photographs/images to tell a story. We had to choose our topics and take pictures of them. It sounds easy, but it was one of the most difficult things that I have to do.

My chosen topic:

"Old people who collects rubbish for a living."

It was a difficult and ambitious topic, as I have to rely on luck most of the time.

In order to take good photographs, there are only 2 ways you can do it: Ask the person for permission or secretly take it.

Asking for permission is extremely difficult, as you know some old people can be grumpy, and they doesn't look affable and friendly at all.

Anyway, with the help of my friend, I managed to locate the pickup point where these rubbish collectors sell their stuff to in Chinatown. Being rather polite and respectful, I asked the seller if I could take pictures of these rubbish collectors.

She said it was best that I ask their permission because of respect. I agreed.

When some of the rubbish collectors came to sell their stuff, they looked at me warily. I explained to them I was from an institution and am doing a project on this topic, and asked if they could allow me to take their photos.

They blatantly refused despite my insistence that I wasn't a reporter. They say they were being photographed secretly and was put into the local chinese newspaper, Lianhe ZaoBao. Some of the reporters even tailed them all the way to their houses and snap pictures of them.

As a result, they were subjected to condemnation from their children, and their children felt it was extremely humiliating for them.

One told me how poor she was, and she couldn't apply any welfare scheme because his son is 15 years old.

You could hear her voice trembling as if she's on the verge of crying. Her face had so many wrinkles, each probably represents the hardships she has been through.

"The landlord increased my rental from $33 to $110 per month! Tell me how am I going to survive?! My son is only 15 years old and he still needs to study! The government kept saying there is growth in economy, but how come people like us aren't able to enjoy?"

I was stunned. I didn't know what to reply her. An old woman telling me her sad plight, and all I could do is to offer her my listening ear. I'm not a goverment official or some welfare officer. I'm just only a student.

I mean, Singapore is one of the top cities in the world to live in, and I find it hard to believe that such plights exists in Singapore.

The only thing I could do was to console her, and wished her all the best. Then, she went to elsewhere to collect her stuff again..


I was emotionally in a turmoil and in a dilemma as well.

My purpose was to take photographs to highlight their plight. And they didn't allow me to because of their phobia of reporters and condemnation from their children. But yet if I secretly take their pictures, then I'm not showing any empathy at all.

If I don't practise what I preach, who am I to tell people what to do?

I was simply torn apart.

Thankfully, I managed to go other places and there were 2 whom allowed me to take photos.

Usually when I asked these old people for permission, I usually say if I can treat them lunch or a drink, given by their plight.

But there was this old lady who comes to this particular block from 5.30am onwards to collect rubbish told me:

"Little boy, I don't want your 5 cents or 10 cents. I only spend money that I earn myself."

At that point, I was dumbstruck and speechless. Her strong-willingness is something that I'll never learn, and I will never be able to possess. The only thing I did was to carry some styrofoam boxes and plastic bags for her from the garbage bin.

I think after all these experiences, I really mellowed. I used to take things for granted every now and then. But now, I appreciates the things I have, although I still take things for granted once in a while.

These images and words will etched in my memory, and it will serve as a reminder of how lucky I am.

But I pray and wish that these old folks will no longer do such jobs anymore, and may they get out of poverty. These old folks deserve a good life after experiencing so much in life.

And I hope they know that when there's a will, there's a way. They will be able to see and experience light at the end of the tunnel.

My birthday celebrations..

Ahhh.. this year's celebrations are pretty much simple yet meaningful. I'm really thankful for all the birthday wishes and greetings, and also the dedications.

Also, a big thank-you for all the presents that each and everyone of you guys have given! I appreciates it!

This is also the first time I celebrated my birthday with my polytechnic friends and it was fun. It was rather an impromptu thing, because we went to Vivocity to catch REC after the school excursion at Southern Ridges.

And thanks a lot to Shirley, Fazal and Becky!

Wishing for my birthday..

They were rather amazed that my shoes can glow. It can reflect light only when there's flash!

Fazal, Shirley and myself..

I'm having my cake!

Fazal, Becky and myself!

With Becky!

Really meaningful time spent with them.. Thanks guys!

Birthday celebrations at Xin Wang HK Cafe.



Force-fed birthday cake!

WeiChong, Vincent and myself.



Ivan and I.

Wah?!

Feng Wei, Wei Chong, Vincent, Jun Ping and Koon Xian..

Yingying and Jia Yi..



What is Koon Xiang doing?!

Such a simple dinner with friends around me, and we went slacking after that. I just feel fortunate and thankful for all the friends that I have.

Thanks a lot everyone!