Unexplainable.

I'm surprised. We're going to have air-conditioned room (IT Room 2) for us because we're one of the graduating classes. I'm impressed by the attempt of the school to help us do well for 'O' levels; by providing air-conditioned rooms for us. This is going to be bad news for me though, as my sinus is probably going to act up anytime.

And thanks to people who did not take their books today, they asked me to take the keys tomorrow. (Damn them.)

And I'm appreciating the effort of Mr Tay and Mdm Lim from the D&T department. I was asking Mr Tay if he could stay back for the night class on friday to let us do our practical and folio, because we need to rush them and it was usual practice for us when we did our 'N' levels.

He agreed to stay back till 8pm. What was surprising was his answer, because I didn't really expect him to agree and he did. He wasn't our subject teacher yet he helped us by sacrificing his free time. I salute you, Mr Tay.

And Mdm Lim, who was kind enough to offer help to us whenever we need them, again, though we weren't her students. She even offered to share us her workshop session with her 4N class. She was nice.

While all these are happening from the D&T, it is, ironically that Mr Tsung who is our subject teacher now doesn't even do such things. Maybe we can't blame him; he underwent a neck surgery and rested for months (That's when Mr Joseph Goh came in.)

We D&T students are extremely unlucky this year. I would wish that only one teacher will take us for the whole year, but it was 2 teachers. And I think we're at risk. So we're going to stay back and do our important work.

On a total different note, my mum was speaking to me just now while I was doing my D&T. She said she could give me tuition if she had the money. And she says she may get one for me, sooner or later. As tuition for me is mainly Maths, my mind suddenly thought of Zi Cai and Mrs Yap. Sigh, as I express my feelings, I suddenly feel depressed and sad now. I can't explain why. Maybe I let them down.

I then thought of my relatives who are taking 'O' levels with me this year. My 2 biological cousins; Shermaine and Eunice (I think) come from prestigious schools. I should have graduated by now, but since I'm in the NA stream, I'm taking it with them. And, I suddenly feel so stupid. Both of them have no problems going to JCs, and I'm probably the one struggling. I ask myself questions..


"Why am I feeling stupid?"


"Why am I like this?"




And as I'm typing, I'm crying. I seriously cannot explain. I can't control my emotions. I guess I'm already under alot of stress, plus some classmates called me names which I extremely pissed off.

I feel I'm being bombarded with so many things. I feel I'm having alot of responsibilities. (both mentally and physically) I feel may break down soon.




To my classmates who're reading this blog, the cheerful James isn't what he always is, because beneath the expression lies a troubled mind which the soul cannot even decipher.